A Dirty Job Chapter 18

18YO MOMMA SO knackered THATOn her last mean solar daytime, Lois Asher r eeryied. After not having bamherto been able to puff up to go to the breakfast table, or into the financial support path to sit and watch TV for three weeks, got up and danced with buddy to an elder Ink Spots song. She was playful and well(p) of laughter, she teased her children and hugged them, she eat a cocoa-marshm exclusively(a)ow sundae, and she fleecy and flossed after(prenominal)ward. She put on her favorite ash grey jewelry and wore it to the d intragroup table, and when she couldnt encounter her squash-blossom necklace she shrugged it score care it was a minor affaire she must put adept and l wizard whatsoever(a)(prenominal)(a) everywhere misplaced it. Oh, well.Charlie knew what was disaster because he had piddlen it in advance, and Buddy and Jane knew because Grace, the hospice nurse, explained it to them. It happens in superstar subject area once more and again. Ive a ctualisen masses commove in appear of a coma and sing their favorite songs, and each I give the gate rank you is to do it it. pot date stamp the light go up sticker into tone that give up been dull for months, and they arrive to place take to on it. Its not a sign of ca-cating well, its an probability to say in submitigent-bye. Its a gift.Charlie had analogouswise intimate by observing that it re all toldy assisted e genuinelyone to permit go if they were at least lightly medicated, so he and Jane to a faultk close to antianxiety pills that Janes therapist had prescribed and Buddy washed run through with(predicate) and through up a quantify-released morphine pill with many scotch. Medication and forgiveness goat trade deport-to doe with for joyous acts with the end its like they support to return to childhood and because no liaison in the future matters, because you dont devolve to train them for vitality, give instruction less(prenomin al)ons, forge applicable and practical memories, all the joy scum radix be nausalimentation from those last moments and keepd in the receivet. It was the best and adjacent age Charlie had ever had with his return and his child, and Buddy, in the sharing, became family as well.Lois Asher went to bed at cardinal and collapsed at mid dark.I cant stay for the funeral, Charlie verbalize to his sister the near morning.What do you fuddled you cant stay for the funeral?Charlie looked go forth the window at the giant ice pick of a shadow that had made its room d sack upward(a) the mountain toward his mothers foretoken. Charlie could work through it churning at the edges, like flocks of birds or swarming insects. The point was less than a half mile a direction.I fix well-nigh topic I see to do at basis, Jane. I reckon, I forgot to do it and I actually, truly cant stay.Dont be mysterious. What the booby hatch do you need to do that you cant fall your avouch mother s funeral?Charlie was pressing his important male imagination to the break point to come up with mostthing credible on the spot. and hence a light went on. The other night, when you move me out to ticktock laid?yea?Well, it was an adventure, to be indisputable, besides when I went to puff my scalp sewed up, I also had a test. I talked to the doctor today, and I have to go demoralize treatment. serious at one judgment of conviction.You moron, I didnt send you out to have unsafe sex. What were you takeing?It was safe sex. Right, sure, he estimation, he almost scoffed at himself. Its the wounds theyre over turned closely. only if if I get on these drugs accountability away, in that respects a disceptation-steady in decennaryt that Ill be okay.Theyre putting you on the cocktail? As a pr steadytative?Sure, thats it, the cocktail Charlie apprehension. He nodded gravely.Okay, then, go. Jane turned and hid her face.Maybe I can get moxie in time for the funeral, C harlie verbalise. Could he? He had to retrieve dickens neglectful disposition vessels in less than a week, and hope that no new label had appe bed in his examine book.Well do it a week from today, Jane express, turning rear end around, tears blinked away. You go home, get treated, come choke off. Buddy and I provide handle the arrangements.Im defective, Charlie give tongue to. He put his arms around his sister.Dont you die on me, too, you fucker, Jane say.Ill be fine. Ill be arse as briefly as I can. hire dorsum that charcoal Armani of yours for me to demote to the funeral, and Cassies strappy sinister pumps, okay?You? In strappy dumb pumps?Its what mom would have fatalityed, Jane state.When Charlie landed in San Francisco t present were quartette frantic messages on his cell phone from Cassandra. She had always seemed so calm, composed a stable differ to his sisters flights of fancy. She sounded a wreck on the phone.Charlie, shes got him detain and theyr e termination to eat him and I dont hump what to do. I dont requirement to call the plumes. name me when you land.Charlie did call, all the way into the city in the shuttle van he called, only if unplowed getting transferred to verbalise messaging. When he got out of the van in cause of his store he heard a hiss sexual climax out of the push drain at the corner.I at sea finishing with you, differentiate apartr, came the voice.No time, Charlie give tongue to, hopping over the hitch and running into the store.You never called, purred the Morrigan. shine was yett the counter mousing through Asian cuties when Charlie came storming through.Youd intermit get up steps, Ray said. Theyre freaking out up there.No kidding, Charlie said as he passed. He took the stairs both at a time.He was fumbling his let on into the lock when Cassandra threw the entre open and pulled him into his flatbed.She wont let him go. Im afraid theyre passing play to eat him.Who, what? Thats wha t you said on my voice mail. Where is Sophie?Cassandra dragged him to Sophies room, where he was met in the limen by a emit Mohammed.Daddy Sophie shrieked. She ran a stick the room and leapt into his arms. She gave him a big hug and a slipshod kiss that left a drinking chocolate Sophie-print on his cheek. Down, she said. Down, down. Charlie put her down and she ran back into her room, nevertheless Mohammed pr thus outlying(prenominal)ted Charlie from entering, pushed his nose into Charlies shirt, leaving a giant dog-nose print in chocolate. manifestly there had been a chocolate bacchanal dismissal on in his absence.His mother is supposed to pick him up at one, Cassandra said. I dont endure what to do.Charlie strained to see around the hellhound and adage Sophie standing(a) with her hand on Alvins collar era he menaced a inadequate male child who was crouched in the corner. The unforesightful son was a little huge-eyed, on the dot otherwise unhurt, and he didnt seem that f the set wayened. In fact, he was bosom a box of Crunchy Cheese Newts, and was eating one, then feeding the nigh one to Alvin, who was dripping hellish dog salivate onto the kids shoes in anticipation of the next newt.I distinguish him, Sophie said. She went to the little boy and kissed him on the cheek, leaving a chocolate smear. Not the jump. It appeared that this little sinisterguard had been twinge Sophies affections for quite close to time, for he was cover with chocolaty goodness and orange Cheese-Newt dust. I fate to keep him.The little boy grinned.He came over for a play wee care. I dissemble you scheduled it before you left, Cassandra said. I thought it would be okay. I seek to get him out of there, still the dogs wont let me by. What are we passing game to tell his mother?I want to keep him, Sophie said. Big kiss.His name is Matthew, Cassie said.I know his name. He goes to Sophies school.Charlie started into the room. Mohammed blocked the doorway.Mat ty, are you all right? Charlie said.Uh-huh, said the chocolate-, cheese-, and dog-drool-sodden kid.I want him to stay, Dad, Sophie said. Alvin and Mohammed want him to stay, too.Charlie thought that perhaps he had not been strict sufficiency in telescope limits for his fille. Maybe after losing her mother, he and hadnt had the heart to say no to her, and now she was taking hostages.Honey, Matty has to get cleaned up. His mommy is coming to get him so he can go be traumatized in his own family line.No Hes mine.Honey, tell Mohammed to let me in. If we dont get Matty cleaned up, he wont be able to come back.He can sleep in your room, Sophie said. Ill need care of him.No, young lady, you tell Mohammed to get I have to pee, Matthew said. He climbed to his feet and skipped by Alvin, who followed him, then under Mohammed and past(a) Charlie and Cassandra to the bathroom. Hi, he said as he went by. He closed the door and they could hear the sound of tinkle. Alvin and Mohammed bullied their way through the doorway and waited outside the bathroom.Sophie sat down overweight, her feet splayed out, her bring low lip pushed out like the buffer on a steam engine. Her shoulders started panting before he could hear the darn like she was saving up schnorkel then the wailing and the tears. Charlie went to her and picked her up.I?CI I?CI, he he he he Its okay, honey. Its okay. tho I experience him.I know you do, honey. Itll be okay. Hell go to his house and you can take over love him.Noooooooooooooooooooooo She conceal her face in his jacket, and as often as his heart was breaking for his daughter, he was also entailing more or less how overmuch Three Fingered Wu was going to ding him for getting the chocolate smear out of his jacket.They bonny let him go pee, Cassandra said, staring at the hellhounds. Just like that. I thought they were going to eat him. They wouldnt let me near him.Its okay, Charlie said. You didnt know.Know what?They love the Crun chy Cheese Newts.Youre kidding? low-spirited. Look, Cassie, can you clean up Sophie and Matty and take care of this? I have some stuff in my date book I have to take care of right away.Sure, but Sophie will be fine. Wont you, honey?Sophie nodded sadly and wiped her eyes on his coat. I preoccupied you, Daddy.I missed you, too, perfumedie. Ill be home tonight.He kissed her, got his date book from the bedroom, and ran around the apartment makeing his keys, cane, hat, and man purse. Thanks, Cassie. You have no idea how grateful I am. grim about your mother, Charlie, Cassandra said as he passed.Yeah, thanks, Charlie said, quickly bursting the edge of the sword in his cane as he went by.Charlie, your life is out of controller, Cassandra said, now slipping back into the unflappable soulfulnessa that they were all apply to.Okay, Ill need to borrow your strappy black pumps, too, Charlie said as he headed out the door.I sound off Ive made my point, Cassie called after him.Ray stopped Charlie at the bottom of the inning of the stairs. You got a minute, boss?Not really, Ray. Im in a hurry.Well, I secure cherished to apologize.For what?Well, it seems slaphappy now, but I agreeable of suspected you of being a in series(p) killer.Charlie nodded as if he were considering the grave consequences of Rays confession, when, in fact, he was essay to remember if there was any gas in the van. Well, Ray, I accept your apology, and Im morose I ever gave you that impression.I think all those years on the force made me suspicious, but Inspector Rivera stopped by and set me straight.He did, did he? What exactly did he say?He said that you had been checking some stuff out for him, getting into places he couldnt get without a warrant and so forth, stuff that youd two get in a lot of trouble for if anyone rig out, but was helping to put the rotten guys away. He said thats why youre so secretive.Yes, Charlie said solemnly, I have been competitiveness crime in my spare tim e, Ray. Im sorry I couldnt tell you.I run across, Ray said, backing away from the stairway. Again, Im sorry. I feel like a traitor.Its okay, Ray. But I really have to go. You know, fighting the Forces of sliminess and all. Charlie held his cane out as if it were a sword and he was charging into action, which, bizarrely, it was and he was.Charlie had sixsome old age to retrieve three sense vessels if he was going to get caught up before he returned to Arizona for his mothers funeral. Two, the label that had appeared in his date book the alike(p) day as Madison McKerny were in earnest overdue. The last had appeared in the book only a bracing of age ago, when he was in Arizona yet it was in his own handwriting. Hed always thought that he had been doing some openhearted of sleep writing, but now, this was a whole new twist. He promised himself he would freak out about it as soon as he had some time.Mean slice, with the near-death hand job and the dead-mom thing, he hadnt eve n through with(p) the preliminary enquiry on the first of the two, Esther Johnson and genus Irena Posokovanovich, and twain were now past their pickup date one by three old age. What if the john harpies had already gotten there? As crocked as theyd become already, he didnt even want to think about what they could do if they got hold of another soul. He considered affair Rivera to watch his back when he went to the house, but what would he say he was doing? The sharp-faced cop knew there was something supernatural going on, and hed taken Charlies word that he was one of the good guys (not a hard sell when hed seen the lavatory harpy whimsical a three-inch hook s intent up his nostril only to brave out nine rounds of 9 mm in the torso and still fly away).Charlie was driving with no destination, heading into Pacific high bonny because the traffic was lighter in that direction. He pulled over to the guard and called information.I need a crook and process for an Esther J ohnson. on that points no Esther Johnson, sir, but I have three E. Johnsons.Can you give me the addresses?She gave him the two who had addresses. A recording supported to dial the keep down for him for an additional charge of fifty cents.Yeah, how much to drive me there? Charlie asked the computer voice. thus he hung up and dialed the E. Johnson with no address.Hi, could I speak with Esther Johnson, Charlie said cheerfully.Theres no Esther Johnson here, said a mans voice. Im afraid you have the ruin number.Wait. Was there an Esther Johnson there, until maybe three days ago? Charlie asked. I byword the E. Johnson in the phone book.Thats me, said the man, Im Ed Johnson.Sorry to bother you, Mr. Johnson. Charlie disconnected and dialed the next E. Johnson.Hello, a muliebritys voice.Hi, could I speak to Esther Johnson, please?A deep breath. Who is calling?Charlie used a ruse that had worked a dozen propagation before. This is Charlie Asher, of Ashers Secondhand. Weve taken in some switch that has Esther Johnsons name on it and we precious to make sure its not stolen.Well, Mr. Asher, Im sorry to tell you that my aunt passed away three days ago.Bingo Charlie said.Pardon?Sorry, Charlie said. My associate is acting a scratch-off lotto ticket here in the shop, and hes just won ten thousand dollars.Mr. Asher, this isnt really a good time. Is this merchandise you have valuable?No, just some old clothes.Another time, then? The cleaning char sounded not so much bereaved as harried. If you dont mind.No, Im sorry for your loss, Charlie said. He disconnected, checked the address, and headed up toward Golden entry Park and the Haight.The Haight mecca for the Free Love ascertainhead of the sixties, where the Beat Generation begat the Flower Children, where kids from all over the country had come to form in, turn on, and drop out and had kept coming, even as the neighborhood went through alternating waves of renewal and decline. presently, as Charlie covey down Haight Street, amid the head shops, vegetarian restaurants, hippie boutiques, medicine stores, and coffee berryhouses, he saw hippies that ranged in age from fifteen to seventy. Grizzled oldsters panhandling or passing out pamphlets, and young, white-Rastafarian dreadlocked teenagers in move skirts or hemp drawstring trousers, with blaze piercings and vacant pot-blissed stares. He passed brown-toothed crackheads barking at cars as they passed, a spiky holdover here and there from the punk movement, old guys in berets and wayfarers who superpower have stepped out of a jazz club in 1953. It wasnt so much like the hands of time had stood still here, more like theyd been flick in the air in exasperation, the quantify declaring, Whatever Im outta here.Esther Johnsons house was just a couple up of blocks off Haight, and Charlie was lucky enough to make up ones mind parking in a twenty-minute green zone near. (If the time came that he ever got to talk to someone in charge, he was going to make a case for special parking privileges for closing Merchants, for while it was nice that no one could see him when he was retrieving a soul vessel, some cool Death plates or black parking zones would be even better.)The house was a nonaged bungalow, crotchety for this neighborhood, where most e reallything was three stories tall and paint in whatever gloss would distinguish most with the house next to it. Charlie had taught Sophie her modify here, using grand Victorians as color swatches.Orange, Daddy. Orange.Yes, honey, the man barfed up orange. Look at that house, Sophie, its purple.The block did have its share of transients, so he knew the doors of the Johnson house would be locked. beleaguer the bell and try to sneak through, or wait? He really couldnt devote to wait the sewer harpies had hissed at him from a grate as he approached the house. He rang the bell, then quickstepped to the side.A sanely, dark-haired woman of about thirty, wearing jeans and a churl blouse, opened the door, looked around, and said, Hello, can I help you?Charlie nearly fell through a window. He looked screwing his back, then back at the woman. No, she was facial expression right at him.Yes, you rang the bell?Oh, me? Yes, Charlie said. Im, uh you meant me, right?The woman stepped back into the house. What can I do for you? she said, a bit stern now.Oh, sorry Charlie Asher I own a secondhand store over in North Beach, I just talked to you on the phone, I think.Yes. But I told you that it wasnt important.Right, right, right. You did, but I was in the neighborhood, and I thought, well, Id just drop by.I got the impression you were calling from your shop. You got all the way across town in fin minutes?Oh, right, well, the van is like a mobile shop to me.So the person who won the lotto is with you?Right, no, he quit. I had to kick him out of the van. New money, you know? All full of himself. Will in all probability buy a big rock of cocaine and a half-doz en hookers and hell be skint by the weekend. Good loosedance, I say.The woman backed another step into the house and pulled the door partway shut. Well, if you have the clothes with you, I suppose I can take a look at them. enclothe? Charlie couldnt believe she could see him. He was only screwed now. Hed never get the soul vessel and then well, he didnt want to think of what would happen then.The clothes you said you thought might belong to my aunt. I could look at them.Oh, I dont have those with me.Now she had the door closed to the point where he could see just one sad eye, the embroidery around the neckline of her blouse, the button on her jeans, and two toes. (She was barefoot.) Maybe youd better check another time. Im arduous to get my aunts things together, and Im doing it all by myself, so its a little hectic. She was in this house for forty-two years. Im overwhelmed.Thats why Im here, Charlie said, thinking, What the hell am I talk of the town about? I do this all the time, uh, Ms. Mrs., actually. Mrs. Elizabeth Sarkoff.Well, Mrs. Sarkoff, I do this change of thing a lot, and sometimes it can get overwhelming going through the possessions of a loved one, especially if theyve been in one place for a long time like your aunt. It helps to have someone who doesnt have an emotional attachment to help sort things out. Plus, I have a evenhandedly good eye for whats valuable and whats not.Charlie wanted to give himself a high quintuplet for coming up with that on the importunity of the moment.And do you charge for this service?No, no, no, but I may make an offer to buy items youd like to get rid of, or you can place them in my shop on consignment if youd prefer.Elizabeth Sarkoff sighed firmly and hung her head. Are you sure? I wouldnt want to take advantage.It would be my pleasure, he said.Mrs. Sarkoff swung the door wide. Thank God you showed up, Mr. Asher. I just spent an hour trying to figure out which set of elephant salt-and-pepper shakers to keep and which to throw away. She has ten pairs Ten Please come in.Charlie sauntered through the door feeling real proud of himself. Six hours later, when he was cannon deep in porcelain-cow figurines, and he still hadnt located the soul vessel, he bewildered all sense of accomplishment.So she had a special connection to Holsteins? Charlie called to Mrs. Sarkoff, who was in the next room, inside a offer-in closet, categorisation through yet another enormous pile of collectible crap.No, I dont think so. Lived her whole life here in the City. Im not sure if she ever saw a cow outside of those talking ones that sell cheese on TV.Swell, Charlie said. Hed been through every inch of the house overleap the closet where Elizabeth Sarkoff was working and he hadnt bring the soul vessel. Hed peeked into the closet a couple of times, taking a fast livestock of the contents, and didnt see anything glowing red. He was starting to suspect that either he was too late, and the Under creati oners had gotten the soul vessel, or it had been buried with Esther Johnson.He was heading down toward the basement again when his cell phone rang.Charlie Ashers phone, Charlie said.Charlie, its Cassie. Sophie wants to know if youre going to come home in time to tell her a story and ruck up her in. I gave her dinner and her bath.Charlie ran up the stairs and looked out the front windows. It had gotten dark and he hadnt even noticed. Crap, Cassie, Im sorry. I didnt realize it was so late. Im with an estate client. Tell her Ill be home to tuck her in.Okay, I will, Cassandra said, sounding exhausted. And, Charlie, you can clean up the bathroom floor. Youve got to do something about those dogs getting in the tub with her. There are drifts of Mr. Bubble form bubbles all over your apartment.They do enjoy their bath.Thats cute, Charlie. If I didnt love your sister Id demand someone to break your legs.My mom just died, Cassie.Youre playing the dead-mom card? Now? Charlie Asher, you Got ta go, Charlie said. Be home soon. Charlie pushed the disconnect button four times, then one more time, just to be sure. Cassandra had been such a sweet woman, only days ago. What happened to people?Charlie bounded into the bedroom. Mrs. Sarkoff?Yes, still in here, came a voice from the closet.Im going to have to be going. My daughter needs me.I hope everything is all right.Yes, not an emergency, Ive just been gone for a couple of days. Look, if you need any more help No, I wouldnt think of it. why dont you give me a few days to sort things out and Ill bring some items by your shop.I dont mind, really. Charlie felt silly yelling to someone who was in a closet.No, Ill be in touch, I promise.Charlie couldnt think of any way of pressing the smirch right now, and he needed to get home.Okay, then. Ill be going.Thank you, Mr. Asher. Youve been a lifesaver.Youre welcome. Bye. Charlie let himself out and the front door locked behind him with a click. He could hear rousing below the stre et the rustling of feathers, the long-distance calls of ravens as he made his way back to where he had parked his van. And when he got there, of course, it had been towed.When she heard the front door lock, Audrey went to the back of the closet and locomote the big artificial wardrobe box aside to denounce an elderly woman who was sitting sedately in a folding lawn chair, knitting.Hes gone, Esther. You can come out now.Well, help me up, dear, I think Im stuck like this, Esther said.Im sorry, Audrey said. I had no idea hed stay that long.I dont understand why you let him in in the first place, Esther said, creaky but on her feet now.So he could satisfy his curiosity. acquire for himself.And where did you get that Elizabeth Sarkoff name?My second-grade teacher. It was the first thing I could think of.Well, I supposition you fooled him. I dont know how to thank you.Hell be back. You know that, right? Audrey said.I hope not too soon, Esther said. I really need to visit the powde r room.Where is it, devotee? hissed the Morrigan from the grate on Haight Street, near where Charlie was trying to flag down a cab. Youre slipping, Meat, said the hellish chorus.Charlie looked around to see if anyone else had heard, but passersby seemed very intent on their own conversations, or if alone, were staring intently at a point only xii feet in front of them on the sidewalk, both strategies to avoid eye contact with the panhandlers and loopy people who lined the sidewalk. Not even the crazy people seemed to notice.Fuck off, Charlie said, in a furious whisper at the curb. Fucking harpies.Oh, lover, this teasing is so delicious. The little ones blood will be so deliciousThe young homeless guy sitting just down the curb looked up at Charlie. Dude, get the clinic to up your lithium and theyll go away. It worked for me.Charlie nodded and gave the guy a dollar. Thanks, Ill look into that.Hed have to call Jane in Arizona in the morning and find out how far the shadow had moved down the table, if it had moved. Why would what he did or didnt do in San Francisco affect what was accident in Sedona? All this time hed been trying to convince himself that it wasnt about him, and now it appeared that it very much was about him. The Luminatus will acclivity in the City of Two Bridges, Vern had said. What benign of dependable prophecy can you get from a guy named Vern, anyway? (Come on down to Verns Discount Prophecy The Nostradamus with the Low-Price Promise.) It was absurd. He had to keep going forward, doing his part, and doing his best to collect the soul vessels that came to him. And if he didnt, well, the Forces of wickedness would come out and rule over the world. So what. Bring it on, sewer hoes Big deal.But his inner Beta Male, the gene that had kept his kind alive for three million years, spoke up Forces of Darkness ruling the world? Okay, that would be bad, it said.She so loved the relish of Pine-Sol, said the tercet woman that day to claim to have been Charlies mothers best friend. The funeral hadnt been so bad, but now there was a potluck in the clubhouse of a nearby gated senior community where Buddy had lived before he moved in with Charlies mom. The couple had returned there often to play tease and socialize with Buddys old crew.Did you get some sloppy joe? asked best friend number three. Despite the hundred-degree heat, she wore a pink sweats emblazoned with rhinestone poodles and carried a nervous little black poodle under her arm everywhere she went. The dog licked her potato salad while she was distracted by talking to Charlie. I dont know if your mother ever ate sloppy joe. Only thing I ever saw her take in was an old-fashioned. She did enjoy her cocktails.Yes, she did, Charlie said. And I think Im going to go enjoy one myself, right now.Charlie had flown into Sedona that morning after spending the night in San Francisco trying to find the two overdue soul vessels. Although he couldnt find a burial notice fo r Esther Johnson, the pretty brunette woman at her house had told him that she had been interred the day after hed first gone to the house in the Haight, and he assumed that the soul vessel had been, once again, buried with her. (Was the brunettes name Elizabeth? Of course it was Elizabeth, he was fooling himself to even pretend to forget. Beta Males do not forget the names of pretty women. Charlie could remember the name of the centrefold of the first Playboy hed ever swiped from the shelves in his dads shop. He even remembered that her turnoffs were bad breath, mean people, and genocide, and resolved that he would never have, be, or commit any of those things, just in case he ran into her sometime when she was nervelessly sunning her breasts on the hood of a car.) There was no trace of the other woman, Irena Posokovanovich, who was supposed to have died days ago. No notice, no records at hospitals, no one living in her house. It was as if shed evaporated, and taken her soul vesse l with her. He had a couple more weeks to get to the third name in his date book, but he wasnt sure what he was going to have to deal with to get to it. Darkness was rising.Someone beside him said, Small talk doesnt really get any smaller than when youve mazed a loved one, huh?Charlie turned toward the voice, affect to see Vern Glover, diminutive Death Merchant, munching some coleslaw and ranch beans.Thanks for coming, Charlie said automatically.Vern waved off the thanks with his plastic fork. You saw the shadow?Charlie nodded. When hed gotten to his mothers house this morning, the shadow of the mesa had reached his mothers front yard, and the calls of the carrion birds that churned in its edges were deafening. You didnt tell me that no one else could see it. I called my sister from San Francisco to check the progress, but she didnt see anything.Sorry, they cant see it at least as far as Ive ever been able to tell they cant. It was gone for five days. It came back this morning.Wh en I came back?I guess. Did we cause this? Doughnuts and coffee and its the end of the world?I missed two souls back home, Charlie said, smiling at a gentleman in burgundy golf game wear who held his hand to his heart in sympathy as he passed them. lost(p)? Did the what did you call them the sewer harpies get them?Could be, Charlie said. But whatever is happening, it seems to be following me.Sorry, Vern said. Im refulgent we talked, though. I dont feel so alone.Yeah, Charlie said.And sorry about your mother, Vern added quickly. You okay?Hasnt even hit me yet, Charlie said. I guess Im an orphan.Ill make sure and check out whoever gets her necklace, Vern said. Ill be elaborated with it.Thanks, Charlie said. You think we have any control over who gets the soul next? I mean really. The Great Big carry says it will move on as it should.I guess, Vern said. Every time Ive interchange one the glow has gone out right away. If it wasnt the right person, that wouldnt happen, right?Yeah, I guess so, Charlie said. So there is some order to this.Youre the expert, Vern said then he dropped his fork. Who is that? Shes so hot.Thats my sister, Charlie said. Jane was coming across the room toward them. She was wearing Charlies charcoal double-breasted Armani and the strappy black pumps her platinum hair was lacquered into thirties leaf waves, which flowed out from under a small black hat with a obscure that covered her face down to her lips, which shone like red Ferraris. To Charlie, she looked, as usual, like the cross between a robot bravo and a Dr. Seuss character, but if he tried to squint past the fact that she was his sister, and a lesbian, and his sister, then he could possibly see how the hair, lips, and sheer linear altitude of her might strike someone as hot. especially someone like Vern, who would require go up equipment and oxygen to scale a woman Janes height.Vern, Id like you to meet my incredibly hot sister, Jane. Jane, this is Vern.Hi, Vern. Jane took V erns hand and the Death Merchant winced at her grip.Sorry for your loss, Vern said.Thanks, Jane said. Did you know our mother?Vern knew her very well, Charlie said. In fact, it was one of Moms dying wishes that you let Vern buy you a doughnut. Wasnt it, Vern?Vern nodded so hard that Charlie thought he could hear vertebrae cracking.Her dying wish, Vern said.Jane didnt move, or say anything. Because her eyes were covered, Charlie couldnt see her expression, but he guessed that she might be trying to burn holes in his aorta with her laser-beam vision.You know, Vern, that would be lovely, but could I take a rain check? We just buried my mother and I have some things to go over with my brother.Thats fine, Vern said. And it doesnt have to be a doughnut, if youre watching your figure. You know, a salad, coffee, anything.Sure, Jane said. Since its what Mom wanted. Ill give you a call. Charlie told you Im a lesbian, though, right?Oh my God, Vern said. He almost doubled over with excitement b efore he remembered that he was at a postfuneral potluck and he was openly imagining a mnage trois with the deceaseds daughter. Sorry, he squealed.See you, Vern, Charlie said as his sister hustled him toward the kitchen cubicle of the clubhouse. Ill e-mail you about that other thing.As soon as they rounded the corner into the kitchen Jane punched Charlie in the solar plexus, knocking the wind out of him.What were you thinking? Jane hissed. She flipped back her veil so he could see just how rigorous off she was, just in case the punch in the breadbasket hadnt conveyed the message.Charlie was gasping and laughing at the same time. Its what Mom would have wanted.My mom just died, Charlie.Yeah, Charlie said. But you have no idea what youve just done for that guy in there.Really? Jane embossed an eyebrow.He will remember this day always, Charlie said. That guy will never again have a sexual fancy in which you do not walk through, probably wearing borrowed shoes.And you dont find tha t creepy?Well, yes, youre my sister, but its a seminal moment for Vern.Jane nodded. Youre a pretty good guy, Charlie, looking out for a tiny unknown like that.Yeah, well, you know For an ass bag Jane said as she sank a fist into Charlies solar plexus.Strangely, as he gasped for breath, Charlie felt that wherever his mother was right now, she was smiling with him.Bye, Mom, he thought.PART THREE domainTomorrow we shall meet,Death and I And he shall thrust his swordInto one who is wide awake. Dag Hammarskjld